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Community Forums › Just For Fun › Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only › Frozen Cows!

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Frozen Cows!
Jokes are posted in fun and as the Heading suggests, only clean content allowed. So go on and have a laugh...

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carnie
Joker
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Joined: Jul 12, 2007
Posts: 443
Location: Barnsley. South Yorks.

PostPosted: Sat Oct 06, 2007 10:23 am    Post subject: Frozen Cows! Reply with quote

Frozen Cows!

A farmer goes out to his field one morning only to find all of his Cows
frozen solid.

As far as the eye can see are cows, motionless like statues.

It had been a bitterly cold night, but he'd never thought anything like
this would happen.

The realisation of the situation then dawned on him.

With his entire livestock gone, how would he make ends meet? How would
he feed his wife and kids? How would he pay the mortgage?

He sat with his head in his hands, trying to come to terms with his
impending poverty.

Just then, an elderly woman walked by, "What's the matter?" asked the
old lady.

The farmer gestured toward the frozen cows and explained his predicament
to the woman.

Without hesitation the old woman smiled and began to rub one of the cows
noses. After a few seconds the cow began to twitch and was soon back to
normal and chewing the cud.


One by one, the old woman defrosted the cows until the whole field was
full of healthy animals.

The farmer was delighted and asked the woman what she wanted as a
repayment for her deed.

She declined his offer and walked off across the field.

A passer-by who had witnessed the whole thing approached the farmer.

"You know who that was don't you?" asked the passer-by.

"No" said the farmer "who?"







"That was Thora Hird." Mr. Green Mr. Green



Ps. For my American Cousins, Thora Hird was a great British Actress who was made a Dame = to a Sir in Britain.
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nuccia
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Joined: Jul 10, 2007
Posts: 4363
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada

PostPosted: Sat Oct 06, 2007 10:43 am    Post subject: Re: Frozen Cows! Reply with quote

I know this is a jokes section but I would like to hear more about Thora Hird. Sounds interesting..

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nuccia
Italian Surname Database

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Carole
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Joined: Jul 10, 2007
Posts: 1662
Location: Valtellina - Near Lake Como

PostPosted: Sat Oct 06, 2007 2:06 pm    Post subject: Re: Frozen Cows! Reply with quote

nuccia wrote:
I know this is a jokes section but I would like to hear more about Thora Hird. Sounds interesting..

Oh you daft ha'porth kiss

Thora Hird = Thaw a Herd.....Boom Boom!!!! Mr. Green

But there was a very funny actress called Thora Hird - hence the play on words. This is the only clip I could find of her special brand of tongue in cheek humour!

> Thora Hird <

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liviomoreno
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Joined: Sep 08, 2007
Posts: 1134
Location: Rome (Italy)

PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2007 3:26 am    Post subject: Re: Frozen Cows! Reply with quote

nuccia wrote:
I know this is a jokes section but I would like to hear more about Thora Hird. Sounds interesting..
Thora's Nice History of Britain

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Carole
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Joined: Jul 10, 2007
Posts: 1662
Location: Valtellina - Near Lake Como

PostPosted: Sun Oct 07, 2007 6:28 am    Post subject: Re: Frozen Cows! Reply with quote

liviomoreno wrote:
nuccia wrote:
I know this is a jokes section but I would like to hear more about Thora Hird. Sounds interesting..
Thora's Nice History of Britain

Thanks for that Livio, and indeed those 'Dead Ringer' programmes were very good, but even this very good 'Thora' imitator doesn't quite come up to the standard of our Thora..... Though in all fairness the script was written in typical Thora style!

Unfortunately clips of her work, which spanned almost her entire life, are rarer than 'hen's teeth'! She died at the grand old age of 92 and was indeed a 'National Treasure'!

A clip from the 'web' about her:
"Born in Morecambe on 28 May 1911, she made her stage debut at the age of two months, but was never star-struck: despite frequent hob-nobbing with royalty in later years, she would always bring herself down to earth by recalling mental images of her childhood and adolescence: seeing wounded men returning from the First World War, scrubbing the steps of her parents' house or spending ten years behind the counter at Morecambe Co-op, an experience that gave her a veritable encylopaedia of character references to draw on in her later work."

Here's another short clip including her ...
>Thora with Celia Imrie<

I can remember watching her doing an Alan Bennet monologue called 'Waiting for the telegram' (which he wrote especially for her) - I cried almost from start to finish with that one!

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carnie
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Joined: Jul 12, 2007
Posts: 443
Location: Barnsley. South Yorks.

PostPosted: Thu Oct 11, 2007 9:37 am    Post subject: Re: Frozen Cows! Reply with quote

Carole your spot on. There is only one " Our Thora"
Nearly everyday I watch with Hazel "Last of the Summer Wine" I still laugh at Thora in how she treats her husband Wesley. Although Iv'e seen and grown up with Last of the Summer Wine, all the actors albeit now getting on and some original ones like Bill Owen (Compo) and Thora who died the acting is Timeless.
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