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Community Forums › Just For Fun › Jokes & Riddles-Clean Jokes Only › You Know Your Italian When...

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You Know Your Italian When...
Jokes are posted in fun and as the Heading suggests, only clean content allowed. So go on and have a laugh...

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calabriangirl
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Joined: Jul 15, 2007
Posts: 8

PostPosted: Wed Nov 21, 2007 10:47 pm    Post subject: You Know Your Italian When... Reply with quote

DURING YOUR CHILDHOOD,, THE FOLLOWING OCCURED:

1.You have at least one relative who wore a black dress every day for an entire year after a funeral.

2.You spent your entire childhood thinking what you ate for lunch was pronounced "sangwich."

3.Your family dog understood Italian.

4.Every Sunday afternoon of your childhood was spent visiting your grandparents and extended family.

5.You've experienced the phenomena of 150 people fitting into 50 square feet of yard during a family cookout.

6.You were surprised to discover the FDA recommends you eat three meals a day, not seven.

7.You thought killing the pig each year and having salami, capacollo, pancetta and prosciutto hanging out to dry from your shed ceiling was absolutely normal.

8.You ate pasta for dinner at least three times a week, and every Sunday.

9.You grew up thinking no fruit or vegetable had a fixed price and that the price of everything was negotiable through haggling.

10.You were as tall as your grandmother by the age of eleven.

11.You thought everyone's last name ended in a vowel.

12.You thought nylons were supposed to be worn rolled to the ankles.

13.Your mom's main hobby is researching other family to go visit (yeah mom).

14.You were surprised to find out that wine was actually sold in stores.

15.You thought that everyone made their own bottled tomato sauce.

16.You never knew what to expect when you opened the margarine, after all you thought washing out and reusing margarine containers was normal.

17.You never ate meat on Christmas Eve .

18.You ate your salad after the main course.

19.You thought Catholic was the only religion in the world.

20.Your were beaten at least once with a wooden spoon or broom.

21.You thought every meal had to be eaten with a hunk of bread in your left hand.

22.Your grandmother never threw anything away, you thought seeing washed plastic bags hanging on the clothes line was normal.

23.You learned to play scopa before you went to school.

24.You can understand Italian but you can't speak it.

25.You have at least one relative who came over on the boat.

26.All of your uncles fought in a World War.

27.You have at least six male relatives named Tony, Frank, Joe or Louie.

28.You have relatives who aren't really your relatives.

29.You have relatives you don't speak to.

30.You drank wine before you were a teenager.

31.You relate on some level, admit it, to the Godfather and the Sopranos.

32.You grew up in a house with a yard that didn't have one patch of dirt that didn't have a flower or a vegetable growing out of it.

33.Your grandparent's furniture was as comfortable as sitting on plastic. Wait!!!! You were sitting on plastic.

34.You thought that talking loud was normal.

35.You thought sugared almonds and the Tarantella were common at all weddings.

36.You thought everyone got pinched on the cheeks and money stuffed in their pockets by their relatives.

37.Your mother is overly protective of the males in the family no matter what their age.

38.There was a crucifix in every room of the house, including the cellar.

39.Boys didn't do house work because it was women's work.

40.You couldn't date a boy without getting approval from your father. (oh, and he has to be Italian)

41.You know what granita is.

42.Your Christmas tree was silver.

43.You called pasta macaroni.

44.You have at least one irrational fear or phobia that can be attributed to your mother.

45.Your father is either a gardener, builder or mechanic.

46.You dreaded taking out your lunch at school, you would pray that you didn't have melanzane again.

47.February 14th is VALENTIMES Day

48. "Delete"

49.Pontiac Parisiennes were also known as Italian Cadillacs

50.Every condition, ailment, misfortune, memory loss and accident was attributed to the fact that you didn't eat something.


You're proud to be Italian - and you pass these jokes on to all your Italian friends

Lol Hope You Enjoy I know I did Razz Wink

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Cathy
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Joined: Jul 10, 2007
Posts: 2681

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 1:39 am    Post subject: Re: You Know Your Italian When... Reply with quote

That was great Jenn! I remember this from way before you were born. I see it is updated since the last time I read it. Thanks.

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BillieDeKid
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Joined: Oct 26, 2007
Posts: 1221
Location: Illinois

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 3:05 am    Post subject: Re: You Know Your Italian When... Reply with quote

Boy oh boy can I relate!!

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Elizabeth
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Vincenza
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Joined: Jul 11, 2007
Posts: 354
Location: Michigan

PostPosted: Thu Nov 22, 2007 10:08 am    Post subject: Re: You Know Your Italian When... Reply with quote

BillieDeKid wrote:
Boy oh boy can I relate!!

You are not alone.

Vincenza

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