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Community Forums › General › General Discussion Groups › what on earth were they thinking?

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what on earth were they thinking?
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Eleven
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 2:51 pm    Post subject: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

I am still working on the trento baptisms for the FHL.

In this area, there is a popular surname "Viola". On occasion, I have found a child or the mother with the first name Viola..so when this name comes up, especially for the mother..you have to make sure which it is, since some priests put last name first and some do the opposite.

Well..last night, I didnt have to worry about that. I found a mother named Viola Viola.

What on earth were these people thinking?
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nuccia
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 3:59 pm    Post subject: Re: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

OMG.. How can someone do that to a child? Then again, some of the names given to children in North America are just as interesting. lol lol

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Eleven
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 4:13 pm    Post subject: Re: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

Ya know..I have been Italian for a very long time. I am familiar with the first names..or so I thought. I have found a lot of strange names that I have never heard of. I wondered if those people made some names up, too. Sometimes, I check the lists on the net for italian first names. Some of these names show up on no lists.

I have seen a lot of the names rhyme..lol Or you see names like Tommaso Tommasini or Giovanni Giovannini. I even had a Melchiore Melchiori..but never an exact match.

I waste so much time on these records trying to read notations or I find myself pondering a lot. I feel bad if they had a still born. Some, even list miscarriages in these records and will actually state the amount of months.

Then I do a lot of wondering about these people. I am betting, the majority didnt even choose to marry the person. I thought more about that when I was doing the marriages on ancestry. Those listed the ages..and I saw some very young girls marrying old men. I am sure that wasnt their choice. I saw one bride..listed as parents unknown..15 years old..marrying some 29 year old guy. Boy..I had some thoughts running thru my head about them. What did the people, whomever she lived with..want to be rid of her?

My aunt (bless her) is going to be 100 in july. She came here from sicily at age 11. She remembers a lot of things from before she came. She used to tell me that parents pushed the girls on whomever wanted them..at very young ages..especially if the parents had a lot of children. She said she would see these young married girls, out playing jump rope..then having to leave to go cook for the husband. Another thing she told me..was that it wasnt uncommon for men to take a mistress..and bring her right into his bed..with the wife.

I know, my grandmother..was asked by her mother..if she wanted to marry my grandfather. She was second youngest of a bunch of kids and her mother was widowed from when she was about 4. My cousins grandmother, came to this country as a young girl. She used to tell the story, that when she was matched up with her husband, at the alter..when they said the vows..she would not say "I do"..she kept saying NO. They told them that she didnt understand english..but she said..I knew what I was saying..I didnt want to marry him..lol Well..they stayed married over 50 years..lol

I couldnt imagine marrying someone who wasnt my choice.
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nuccia
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 4:38 pm    Post subject: Re: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

Alot of what you say is true. I have seen records on the Carini Exchange or on Cosenza Exchange where girls got married as young as 12! My daughter is twelve and I couldn't begin to imagine her getting married...but I guess it was a different era then.

I have heard that my mother was also "promised" to a man much, much older than she was. He was very well off and came from a very good family..he even bought her a beautiful ring but she couldn't see her life with him (I think he was 20 or more years her senior and she was in her early twenties which was quite late to be marrying). Well, the wedding date was set, and the banns ready to be posted. My mother confided in her younger sister that she did not want to go through with this marriage (her sister was only 14 and ready to wed someone herself). Well there was no way my aunt was going to allow this so on the day the banns were supposed to be posted she marched in to the church and told the priest not to dare post the banns because there was no way my mother was going to marry a man she didn't love..

And so the banns were never posted, the engagement called off and she met my dad a few years later. My parents will be married 48 years this December... Thank God for my Aunt! Smile

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JamesBianco
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 4:56 pm    Post subject: Re: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

Eleven wrote:

Well..last night, I didnt have to worry about that. I found a mother named Viola Viola.

What on earth were these people thinking?

Seriously! Just think of the chuckles when she had to give her name in public.

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Eleven
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 5:18 pm    Post subject: Re: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

I know, James. I was chuckling myself...lol I should take a screen shot when I find things like this.

Nuccia..she was lucky she got out of that so easily.

Another thing I see a whole lot of..and I also saw it in my own genealogy are these cousin marriages. My husbands fathers family did that. Second cousins, not first.

When I was doing the marriages at ancestry..more people were related than werent..it looked like. If their last name didnt match..then those of one of the parents did. I wondered if one was marrying the mothers brothers kid (first cousins). Did they have first cousins marrying, there? Or did they limit it to second cousins?

With my husbands family, I believe it was his grandmother..or great grandmother who married her second cousin, then going back..that womans mother did, and so did her grandmother. It looked almost like a family tradition on their side. I think their town is very small..and maybe that could be a reason..not too many famlies there to find a husband not related. I swore, when I did that town..that instead of taking just the names of the grandparents, greats, etc and their children, had I continued sort of sideways and began adding spouses for children, etc..that whole town would have been related, at some point.
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 5:28 pm    Post subject: Re: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

My grandmother's parents were first cousins, his mother and his wife's father were full siblings! What is worse is that the brides parents were 2nd cousins, BOTH related to the groom's mother. I have 13 direct lines of descent from one man named Biagio Marciano. Talk about inbreeding! You should check out this thread I made over on IG where I made a chart showing my descent.

13 lines of Descent

Shocked

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Eleven
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 02, 2009 6:33 pm    Post subject: Re: what on earth were they thinking? Reply with quote

Geeze, you have me beat..lol..

Ya know..people bicker in fun over nationality and italians bicker over regions. My husband (napolitano) always teased me (sicilian/napolitano) about being sicilian. You know..the bad rap we get from the mafia.

When I found this cousin stuff on his fathers side..man..did I have a field day. It took me about 33 years (I am with him since I was 14, married at 18)...to get even with him for all of those years of his sicilian jokes. I would tell him, no wonder his family was nuts..it was from all of the inbreeding...lmao Then I realized....that my kids were part of that..since they were half of him..lol

My daughter and my sisters son were very close growing up. He is 4 months older than her. We live in a small town, so they went all thru school together, had the same friends..etc. Very often, when they were between boyfriends and girlfriends..they would go out together. You have to see these two dance..because they have been dancing together, for ages. People used to think they were boyfriend and girlfriend. I used to say, all of the time..too bad you are cousins...lol They made such a cute little pair. Both are married with children now..to non relatives..lol..but, when there is a wedding or party..these two are up together on the dance floor. I guess their spouses got used to it.
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